It's been a while since I posted a nice embarrassing story about myself

Back in October, after a long and wonderful 12 years, I bid farewell to my much loved and faithful 2001 Honda Civic and bought a brand spanking new Honda CR-V.

I had been resisting the upgrade, because a) I loved my Honda, b) it had been completely paid off for years, and no car payment is niiiiice, and c) there was nothing *technically* wrong with it, despite the fact that it had earned the nickname "Hobo Wagon" due to its rapidly deteriorating aesthetic appearance.

And then I spun out across 4 lanes of traffic on a highway during rush hour. Which, you know, not exactly my car's fault, but did indicate I needed new tires... and I wasn't sure the value of the car was more than a full set of tires.

And then a piece of my car literally FELL OFF in a carwash.

The jig was up. I capitulated and let my civic go to the great car farm in the sky.

And I actually love my CR-V! It is a great little mini-SUV and I am super pleased with the upgrade. The only problem is it appears that about 1 out of every 5 people in this region felt the same way, because this car is evvvverrryyyywhere. Any time I look around me I can spot like 5 other CR-Vs within a 100 yard radius. Which, I mean, isn't really a PROBLEM per se.

Unless you are me! Naturally!

Yesterday I was coming out of a store and sauntered up to my car, which was sitting exactly where I'd left it in the parking lot, as it should be. I did the little remote clicky thing to unlock my doors when I was about 20 feet away (sidebar: HOW GREAT is that little remote clicky thing!!? I had a REALLY OLD car for a REALLY LONG time. The upgrades that, like, every other car now has? They continue to delight me on a daily basis!).

Anyway. I get to my car, open it up, and start to get in... when I notice some rags tucked under the seat. I could not for the life of me figure out what they were from or when they would have gotten there. I hadn't gotten the car washed recently... I definitely hadn't put them there myself... was it possible they'd been there since I bought it and they had just slipped out from under the seat now....?

And actually... why was there a glasses case in the cup holder? Covered in leopard print...?

OH MY SWEET JESUS THIS IS NOT MY CAR OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NOOOO

As panic started to rise with this realization, I went to quickly close the door and back away... but before I could even get the door shut a woman appeared next to me and cheerfully commented "I think that's my car!"

At this point I basically died on the spot. You are hearing this recap from my ghost, because I melted into the pavement from sheer mortification and ceased to be.

"I think your car is, like, three down from here," she continued kindly. "I totally thought yours was mine first, too!"

"q987hwf;m 8i7ey0kdn loiasueugyqe," I stammered, turning what I can only imagine was a truly impressive shade of magenta.

"We both have good taste in cars!" she joked.

"HAHAHA! YEAH! OH MAN, YOU MUST HAVE UNLOCKED YOUR CAR RIGHT AS I... HAHA OHMYGOD I AM SO SORRY I AM SO SORRY SORRY SORRRYYYY OHMYGOD HAHAHAHAAAA ::awkward mule laugh::"

To sum up, it might be wise for me to slap some obnoxious bumper sticker or something on my car to make it stand out in a crowd.