hello! i suck at health.

so overall, 2010 has been a pretty good year. i mean, if you ignore the fact that i appear to be trying to single-handedly raise my company's insurance rates by going in for office visits roughly once a week, because DUDE. with the PROBLEMS.

waaaay back in march, i started noticing some pain around my tailbone. at first it was only if i was rolling over it - eg, doing a full sit up, or sitting down on the floor and rolling back a bit to steady myself, or any number of things in pole class - and it wasn't too severe; just annoying. then it got more annoying. then i was trying a new trick on the pole one evening and audibly yelped in pain, saw stars, and had to take several deep breaths to calm the nausea. i thought perhaps it was time to call the doctor.

so i did! i went in, she asked a few questions, asked if i'd fallen (no) or injured myself (no) or given birth (no, and OH MY LANDS i did not know you could break a tailbone doing that, holy mother of god). she kind of shrugged, said sometimes you don't know how or why you break your tailbone, and sent me in for xrays.

the next day, i went for a run. for, like, 30 seconds, because WOW NO. paaaiin in the arsey region. over the next day or 2 i went from "hey, it hurts to roll over this spot!" to "huh. it hurts to... sit. that's.. annoying."

and! the xray was negative. huh.

several weeks later, after the pain had increased to (and then topped out at) always-hurts-to-sit, wake-up-at-night-because-i'm-leaning-on-it-wrong, can't-bend-over-in-certain-directions hurt, i got an mri. also negative.

there was much general shrugging and the explanation that "sometimes people just have chronic tailbone pain." so sorry! you appear to be one of them! even though it usually stems from an injury that doesn't heal, uh, except you didn't have one of those, but whatever.

then i proceeded to get one of the more raging sinus infections i've experienced, hopped on a plane to san francisco the next day, and tried not to pop an eardrum. (doctor: normally i would tell someone in your condition not to fly. so, well, if you notice any discharge from your ear after you land, just.. uh, go to an ER immediately.) happily, i did not puncture an eardrum, but those flights did manage to basically negate the effects of the antibiotics, and the sinus infection lasted for a good two weeks.

and of course, i stayed at a hotel with bedbugs, and you know how that went.

and then last week, i found myself with a brand new issue: a staph infection. ON MY BOOB. one they're treating aggressively because of MRSA concerns.

FOR REAL. FOR FREAKING REAL. I MAY HAVE MRSA ON MY BOOB.

i mean, i realize i probably don't, but JESUS, PEOPLE. can i please start healing from one random health problem before contracting a new and equally improbable one??

i'm giving myself one month to become uninfected and figure out how to stop being so hurty in the tailbone region, or i am officially firing my body.