October 02, 2009

dear fedex: suck it

ready for a rant? i am!!

so i belong to a wine club from a small napa vineyard, called ceja. four times a year, they mail me a lovely selection of 3 of their wines. since it's alcohol, someone 21+ has to sign for the package when it's delivered. for the last year (and for the year before that, when i belonged to a virginia wine club) fedex comes by during business hours, during which i'm naturally not at home, leaves a door tag, and then comes back the next day - but often later in the day, like 6 or 7, which is very nice of them, because i'm home to sign for the wine by then.

i've considered changing the mailing address to my office, but a) so far - over 2 years! - they've always very nicely returned at a time when i'd be home, and b) it didn't seem very professional to have alcohol repeatedly delivered to my place of business.

anyway! in september, i came home to a door tag saying they'd tried to deliver my wine. alas. i knew i'd be home in time for dinner the next night, so i wasn't worried.

the next day, i come home to another door tag (this time made out to "juliette," inexplicably).

day 3: another door tag. three strikes and i'm out; i'll have to go pick up the package from them. no big deal; i figure i'll do it over the weekend.

the weekend arrives, and i plug the tracking number into their website to see where this place is. the only information it provides is "alexandria, va." so i look up where the alexandria, va locations are on fedex's website... and there are more than one. so how am i supposed to know where to pick up my package? the places seem to be closed for pickups on the weekends, anyway. hrmph.

i decide i'll bail on my monday class specifically to make it to alexandria after work in time to pick up my package. on monday afternoon i call fedex to ask them which place to go to. after 30 minutes on the phone with them, they admit that their systems are down and they haven't been able to track my package since they have no computers. can i call back later?

two hours later, i leave work and call fedex again from my car. their computers are back up, so they can look up my package! ...oh, but it's not actually being held at a regular fedex location, it's being held at a SPECIAL holding facility that they have to call and talk to FOR me so they can work it out that i can go pick it up. oh, and they're only open from 8:30am - 4:30pm. in springfield.

springfield is REALLY not close to where i work. probably a good 45 minutes away, assuming i hit no traffic. and this is the dc metro region: you can never count on not hitting traffic.

and anyway, since this other place is only open until 4:30 each day, fedex explains that i'll need to call back the next day, so that THEY can call the special holding place again when they're actually open. good thing i've cancelled my plans for the night so i could drive down to alexandria, right?

the next day, i call fedex yet again. i ask them first to move my wine to one of these "special holding facilities" that is anywhere near my office or my home. there are no other ones, they tell me. can they hold on to it at ANY OTHER fedex location? no. sorry. my only option is to go to springfield. oh! but! they're also open on saturdays, so i should be fine. right, because my saturdays have been so free and open recently.

i tell them i'll pick it up over the weekend, hopefully, and make them call the secret fedex location to confirm they won't mail my wine back. fedex says they called alternate-fedex and they'll hold on to my package.

saturday rolls around, and it's just not happening. after a night out at the legwarmers, i barely have time to recover before i need to clean my house up from the evening's preparty before shannon arrives to visit. no road trips to springfield possible. but it's ok, right? fedex called alternate fedex and told them to hold on to the package for me.

so today, friday, i work from home. it's nice and slow today since we just closed the quarter on wednesday night, and everyone's taking a bit of a breather. so, perfect time for me to finally go to alexandria, right?

except, haha! turns out they sent my package back today. to california.

to recap: fedex did come to my house 3 separate times, but i was not home during any of them. so they sent my package to a remote location that i could not speak to directly, which is only open until 4:30 each day, that is nowhere close to my home or my office, and couldn't bring the package to ANY OTHER fedex in the state that would have been accessible to me during business hours. i was unable to pick it up on the 1 saturday that has transpired since then, so they sent my package back to california.

motherfucker. you owe me 3 very nice bottles of wine, fedex.


  1. Not cool FedEx, NOT COOL. That's absolutely ridiculous, how do they expect people to drive all that way to pick up a friggin' package for god's sake?! WTF is wrong with these people?!!

  2. I hate it when I have to sign for stuff, I've had to go to the Eisenhower FedEx to pick up stuff before...

  3. I'm probably going to be the lone dissenting opinion, but ... they tried. FedEx really tried to work with you. But, you weren't home. On three different days. And you didn't make it to their warehouse for almost 2 weeks (if I read correctly). I'm sure they have internal policies that state they cannot hold deliveries for more than a certain amount of time. If they didn't, they'd become storage warehouses for all the many people who don't collect their belongings. And that gets really expensive. Plus, it becomes their liability to be able to find your box under the heap, if you know what I mean. I say, change that mailing address to work. I have ALL packages delivered to me at work because of not being home issues. If I can survive receiving all our wedding gifts at work, I'd like to think you can survive a lone box here and there.

  4. Oh Alice, that sucks!! I have had to go to the special FedEx location in Springfield before, fortunately I was able to get there the next day. Sorry to hear about your wine!!! Such alcohol abuse is awful...

  5. nilsa - I agree with the first part, and I have no issues with the 3x, then you pick it up thing. I've done that plenty of times and it's entirely fair. it's the fact that the only place I could pick it up from required me to take 2 hours off work in the middle of the day to retreive it.. I couldn't pick it up before work or after work, and only 1 day on a weekend (when I had houseguests). and I called and specifically asked if it was possible for them to hold it longer than the standard 10 business days, since I could not get there on a business day, and was specifically told a note had been added to hold the package for me. so basically I was given one saturday to retreive it from a location 20 miles from my house, then they sent it back :-P if they were open after 430 on work days... different story. if they had let me use one of the 5432125 fedexs near my home or office... different story. but the random warehouse that I had to call 3 different times before learning details about, located far away and only open until 430.. which I also was told would hold the package?? gah. tough to swallow.

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  7. Rather use UPS? I hate it when I can't get my wine too.


  8. Wtf!!... I think that is seriously messed up. I don't understand how living where you live, that there was not a more convenient location for you to pick up your booze.

  9. Oh no! What a total bummer! :( It's so frustrating to try to pick up packages or have them delivered at home when you work an 8-5 job! Is the winery going to send it back?

  10. They did something similar to this to me, but it was something with a deadline and couldn't find my address. By the time I knew they didn't know where I was, it turned into a nightmare. First they said it was on a truck, but it was (of course, because they didn't know where the address was) the wrong truck. They'd put it on the right one tomorrow. The next day, I called and gave directions to my house and had the dispatcher relay them to the right truck, only the package wasn't on that truck, it had been sent to a holding facility in Philly. Talked to a supervisor, who called the facility to have the package located; it couldn't be located, because it had apparently been returned to the sender. That's when I lost my shit. Interestingly, that night at about 9:00pm, someone pulled up in my driveway. It was a fedex supervisor in his personal car with my package. So I suggest losing your shit on a supervisor.

  11. OMG. Ima gonna go kill them see you soon.

  12. I am not sure everyone here understands the purpose of a vent/rant, which is to express frustration about a situation in a way that defuses/diffuses that frustration. Alice is the reason we know FedEx tried to deliver it three times, so we know she knows this, right? And that therefore she doesn't need it recited back to her as if it is new information, and perhaps as if it is evidence against her?

    And can we assume that FedEx knows that many people work during the working day, just as their own employees do, so that perhaps they need to come up with a workable alternative system for people who can't wait at home all day every day just in case a package is delivered, and that said system should not involve those same working hours when people need to be at work, just as their own employees need to be at work? So can we perhaps take this as a Rant Against The Way Things Are, rather than as An Opportunity to Disagree With YET ANOTHER Blogger as if it were a Hobby?

    Also: I am a little bit drunk.

  13. I just want to add: BUMMER.

    And also, my WV is "trial."

  14. All of that is code for "Some FedEx employees drank your wine."

  15. How odd is this for a co-incidence! I was just following some threads and I ended up on your site, my site is:

    I, too have had loads of problems with the normal post, but I usually get a note pushed through my letter-box telling me to pick up such and such parcel in six hours time!
    What on earth are they doing for six hours? Can't they be bothered to try again in an hour?
    BTW, some really weird things have been happening to me today! I'm beginning to really believe that I am in a parallel universe...or am I now writing to myself?

  16. And you'll never believe that your word verification was SPACK!!! LOL!!

  17. Work delivery is the only way I tell you, the only way.

  18. Bitches, all of them!

  19. I too am in a Wine Club and have wine delivered monthly. I've had to have it delivered to my Grandma's house since she's the only one I know home during the day. But since she's old and has trouble moving around, I'm going to get a mailbox at The UPS Store since they'll sign for and hold all your packages for you. Like a PO box, but an actual physical address.

    I need mah wine!

  20. I had the same situation with a package and it drove me nuts. The item shipped was in a big package and I didn't feel comfortable having it shipped to my work, so I figured if I missed it at home, I'd just go pick it up at FedEx. Evidently, you need to know how your package was shipped in order to goto the right building to pick your package up. In other words, FedEx Ground is in this building, Home Delivery is in this building, etc. Well, the only one listed on the website is the FedEx Ground location, so I went there. They said that I had to go down the street to the other location because it's a Home Delivery package. Well, they failed to mention that the building wasn't labeled with FedEx on it and I was in the middle of a business park! So, I finally find a building with a few Fedex vehicles in front of it, I go in there and they tell me that this is the wrong building as well, this is FedEx Freight, you need to go down two buildings on your left...but it's closed for the day!!! Keep in mind I had to drive 30 miles just to get to the first location to begin with, now I'm also going home empty handed. What a mess. Why wouldn't they have all the divisions based in one building? Or at least have the packages to be picked up in a central location? UPS is across the street from them and have all their divisions together, no wild goose chase to figure out what building to goto (I've been there in the past). In the end, I begged my Mom to come and wait for it the next day, like the wonderful Mother she is, she retrieved it for me at my home. Fortunately, they came first thing and only had to be at my house for an hour. FedEx really needs to re-examine their procedures and make it more user friendly for their customers.