September 10, 2009

sure-fire method to cut back on driving

so yesterday morning, i woke up with a uti. this may be A Lot Of Information for some of you, but honestly it's not that big of a deal... it happens every once in a while. welcome to being a girl.

i also woke up with a REALLY sore throat, but figured it was probably allergy related or something and more or less ignored it. except for every time i tried to swallow, which resulted in excruciating pain, but whatever.

so i made an appointment that morning to see a doctor about the uti, and once i got there, asked him if he could take a quick peek down the ol' throat just in case it was a sudden-onset raging case of strep or something, ha ha, it's probably nothing though, ha ha.

"sure!" he said, and got the little light stick thingie. "say ahh," he said. "ahhhhhh," i said. "....OHHH," he said.

can i just tell you, from vast personal experience, that's NOT usually something you want a doctor to utter? it's not usually good.

turns out i have some weird and disgusting infection of one tonsil, but good news! penicillin knocks that sucker right out. so off i trotted to the pharmacy to get my antibiotic, to cure all the various infections my body was currently hosting.

about three hours later, i reeeally wasn't feeling so hot. i started getting chills at my desk, and felt just overall pretty crapariffic. i decided to drive home and finish working there. or possibly go straight to bed. it was a toss up.

forty-five minutes later, i'm about half a mile from my house, and just about every symptom possible hits me all at once. first i think i'm going to vomit; then i start sweating profusely. my vision starts to swim. i have a Very Very Pressing urge to lay down, rightnownoseriouslyRIGHTNOW. only problem is that i'm DRIVING. and in the left lane of two lanes of traffic, because i have a left turn coming up to get onto my road, so i can't pull over onto the shoulder right away, and i am quickly realizing i have about 15 seconds, max, before i pass out. my vision proceeds from swimming to fading. there's a break in the grass median ahead of me leading into a school parking lot, and i try desperately to focus my vision enough to get through the median and not get hit by any oncoming cars.

i get into the parking lot and yank up the parking brake, turn the a/c on as high as it will go, and get my seat jerked all the way back just before my vision goes completely black. i did actually remain technically conscious the entire time - i could hear the songs changing on the radio for the next few minutes - but i laid there immobile, drenched in sweat, breathing shallowly, with no vision. it probably lasted about five minutes before i could feel my breath start to get a little more normal, and my eyes came back into focus.

in some small part of my brain that wasn't freaking out about the fact that i'd nearly lost consciousness while driving, i was desperately hoping that a cop didn't pull up next to me - i was very illegally stopped in a not-very-safe spot, 10 feet off the road in an active school parking lot - because i was sure he wouldn't let me drive the rest of the way back to my house once i'd recovered, and all i wanted was my bed. i don't think i can't adequately explain how MUCH i wanted to be at my house at that point. especially because i was within easy walking distance of my place by that point, but it was so fundamentally inaccessible at the moment.

after about 5 minutes of that half-passed out state, and another 5 minutes recovering, i put the car back into gear and got my ass home, thankful the entire time that i was so close (seriously, like 2 blocks) because if it had been any further, i would have been far too scared that i'd have another Episode before i could make it home.

i'm feeling MUCH better today, incidentally. my fever broke in the evening, and i stayed in bed from 5p last night until 10:30 this morning. i'm a little nervous to go on any long drives today - or, uh, get in my car at all - but overall i can tell the antibiotic has kicked in, and i am fever-free. i'd just like to request that my body limit itself to ONE infection at a time from here on out, since two at a time appears to be where i go from "inconvenienced" to "body shuts down." doesn't seem too much to ask, right?

34 comments:

Jess said...

OMG that is so scary. I'm glad everything is OK and that you're feeling better!

Raven said...

Jesus lady, I'm glad you made it home safely!

SoMi's Nilsa said...

Sweet jesus, girlfriend. That story was frightening. I'm so glad to hear you're feeling marginally better today. And have not had any further black-out episodes (other than the one better known as sleep). Take care of yourself - and get better!

LA and BD said...

EEEEK! Glad you are okay and feeling better!

lustyreader said...

good golly that is Very Scary! i was on the edge of my seat reading your whole story!

and as frightening as that way, i lol-ed at this part, "i have a Very Very Pressing urge to lay down, rightnownoseriouslyRIGHTNOW."

Malnurtured Snay said...

Also, don't ever read Traffic by Tom Vanderbilt, because you'll never ever drive again.

Jaime said...

I'm glad to hear you're doing better, but wow. That sounds scary, so it had to be terrifying to live it first hand. Jeez. You poor thing. Are you sure you can't stay home and get a little bit more rest?

Cheryl said...

OMFG! What else can I say? How scary! I'm gald you're ok though. Rest up and feel better.

Marie said...

Holy crap woman! I'm SO glad you're ok and made home fine.

Do you need anything? Anything I can do for you?

Feel better soon.

pseudostoops said...

It's such a funny (yet awful) coincidence that we had this same experience within days of each other. It was totally terrifying. Stupid fevers.

Oh, and it's a good thing you caught that tonsil thing when you did- John had the same thing once, ignored it thinking it was a cold, and it turned into an abscess that had to be aspirated with a scary-long needle. Multiple times. Urgh.

Knot said...

Our bodies are AMAZING pieces of machinery. Nothing is built like them. Self-healing, autonomous. God was right, we are, "Fearfully and wonderfully made."

Glad you could make it home. I've had similar moments. You must have had one rip roaring infection.

lacochran said...

Glad you are on the mend. It'd be nice if the same antibiotic knocked everything out simultaneously. Meanwhile, cranberry juice is our friend.

Shelly Overlook said...

Dude. I saw your tweets yesterday and couldn't figure out what was going on. I'm so glad you're okay!

d e v a n said...

Yikes!!I'm glad you're feeling better!

BigSis said...

Poor thing! Feel better soon! I'm so glad you are back!

Shelly said...

WHOA. That is seriously scary. SO GLAD you made it home okay.

shine said...

I'm glad you're safe.

And seriously, my first thought was...Oh no! She licked the pole!

Kristen said...

That is seriously terrifying! Losing my vision, for any length of time, is my worst nightmare.

Holy crap.

Julienne said...

It's so intense when a feeling like that hits you. I had something similar a few weeks ago that left me sitting in a Wal-Mart aisle with my head between my knees and pulled over on a major highway praying someone didn't sideswipe me (and no, totally not pregnant). So not fun. Glad you're feeling better!

ccr in MA said...

Wow, scary! Glad you're doing better today. I'm not sure if I could make myself get back in the car after that.

f.B said...

so so glad you had a little time to decide what to do when all of that hit you. feel better.

Hillary said...

Jesus! That is scary. I'm glad that you're okay(ish)

Dysfunction Junction: said...

Yeesh...

I'm glad to hear you're feeling a wee bit better.

I could make a clever joke about an infection in your throat, but I won't. Cause I lurves you.

LiLu said...

I've been there, except at least my sister was driving while I threw up out the window on the highway because all the pyridium (shit that makes your pee orange but allegedly makes your UTI feel better if you haven't had like 20 of them like I have) made me sick to my stomach.

Funsies!

mylittlebecky said...

hoe.lee. SHIT! that sucks. why does it all have to hit at the same time? stupid bodies. hope you continue to get better.

SLynnRo said...

Um, that is CRAZY!

That Kind of Girl said...

Absolutely terrifying! But a good excuse to convince others to drive you around for a while as you recover?

artemisia said...

Oh, man. I am SO GLAD you are okay. Stay tucked in and get better, lady.

kcinnova said...

Very, VERY SCARY!!
I'm so glad no one was hurt. It could have been much worse, as you are doubtlessly aware.

kilax said...

That is so scary! I am happy you made it home okay. I hate it when you feel completely awful and you just want to get home and it feels like it is taking F-O-R-E-V-E-R!

Feel better :)

Rachel said...

oh wow! I was scared for you while reading the post... kept thinking.. ok, she must be ok, she wrote this post... Hope you're feeling better soon! :-)

Darcey said...

Glad you're doing better, dear!

I had a similar experience with antibiotics, except I was out at dinner with a friend of mine, sitting on a patio, chatting, when in mid-sentence, I rushed/stumbled to the bathroom and proceeded to collapse on the floor and lay there for a few minutes.

She came in and knew something was wrong when I was willingly laying on the cold tile floor of a bathroom.

Luckily, about 5 more minutes with some damp paper towels did the trick.

Pocklock said...

I got a really bad case of teh crampz and passed out at the make-up counter of Bloomingdales. Wacked my head on the counter and everything. Woke up to these gross mall security guys yelling, "I THINK SHE'S ALIVE!"

Fucking. Mortified.

Totally glad you're alright.

On. A. Car. said...

Sorry to be three years late but holy cannoli! That is some crazy shit! I, unfortunately, have the same infections right now, except it's turned from a UTI and sore throat to a mostly (hopefully) cured UTI and THE PLAGUE/flu.
Before I went to college, I had to get the meningitis vaccine, righto? So I'm at the pediatrician with my dad (I couldn't drive due to The Falling Lockers--ever hear about that?) and my dad's like, in the back paying, or something. So I'm at the front desk with nurse who is chatting it up, and I'm like, meh hurmm...and things were getting darker...and then I woke up to the nurses surrounding me. Passed out, hit my chin on the counter and my head on the floor. Remember, it's the PEDIATRICIAN'S office. Probably scarred the kiddies for life.