January 07, 2009

my, what big eyes you have..

man, it sure is a crappy day in dc today. 34 degrees and steadily raining/ icing. at least it's not 32 degrees.. but... still. gross.

yesterday i left work early to stop by my optometrist's office for my dilation exam. when i was there last month my appointment was before work, and getting dilated before you have to do things like "look at a computer screen" or "read" isn't a very good idea, so i scheduled just the dilation bit for yesterday afternoon so i could mosey on home afterwards. and i guess i hadn't been dilated for a while? because i forgot how flipping WEIRD it is.

in addition to the drops that actually dilate the pupil, they also put some drops in that relax one of the muscles in the eye, i guess. and the result is that you can see perfectly fine.... as long as what you're looking at is more than about 3 feet away. anything up close? physically impossible to focus your eyes on it. SO WEIRD. so i could drive fine, because everything outside my car was crystal clear, but i couldn't read the clock in my dashboard. i tried to call my mom, and i literally could not see anything on my phone. i know my parents' phone number, obviously, so i dialed that by touch and hoped that "home" popped up on the screen when i hit send, because there was nothing i could do to verify that was the case until someone answered. i'm used to having awful vision if my contacts are out, so i'm also used to bringing things waaaaay up to my face in order to see them clearly, and it was seriously weirding me out that no matter how close i held the phone, or squinted up my eyes, it made no difference. and yet! i could read the teeny letters of the license plate holder on the car in front of me. wacky.

i took a picture of my dilated eyes, because those were also weirding me out, but i forgot to download it this morning before i left for work. it's a shame, because my eyes DO NOT PLAY AROUND when asked to dilate. the doc came over to where i was waiting for the drops to go into effect and was like "ok! let's see if you've started to dilate yet!" and shone a light near my eyes, and immediately went "WOOOAH! uh, yeah, you are DEFINITELY ready. wow." it looked something like this:

that's a LOT OF PUPIL.

minor boy update: no word from IT Boy, but Stretch emailed me on monday to say what a good time he'd had the day before, to confirm that we were still on for the game this sunday, and to ask if he could take me out for a "real" dinner beforehand on saturday night. i can't make saturday, but he did earn points for asking :-)

20 comments:

  1. That IS a lot of pupil. Hoo boy.

    I hate the dilation test because I always go back to work afterwards, and I feel like everyone sees my crazy eyes. Plus, I can't read a thing, so I'm basically useless.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Did you pick a different day to replace Saturday?? Because YOU SHOULD.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love your eye diagram.

    ReplyDelete
  4. You are right, that is a lot of pupil, and your diagram...awesome.

    I have mixed feelings about Stretch and his dooby brother. oh. man. I can tell I start back teaching today because my sense of humor is rockin'.

    ReplyDelete
  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Awesome diagram. And dang those pupils are dilated!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I have never had to have my eyes dilated; your diagram? That's how my eyes are in the dark. Trippy, no? My eye doctor actually went to dilate them once and told me that she didn't need to, she could see all the way through perfectly well.

    I have perpetual demon eyes in dark lighting situations too.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I spent my childhood getting my eyes dilated every year (thanks to my older sister who had eye issues, *I* got to have yearly exams). You just brought back bad memories. Or maybe it is our crappy weather (same out here in western Loudoun) that is making my eyes hurt?

    ReplyDelete
  9. oh, I hate having my eyes dilated! Your diagram is hilariously accurate.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I always hated how having my pupils dilated made them like instantly dry out. It was like all my tears got sucked out. Blech. BTW: Laski!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I actually think your artist rendering is probably more amusing than the photo would have been anyway.

    I've never actually had my pupils dilated. What sort of eye issues do you have to have in order for them to decide to do that??

    ReplyDelete
  12. Can't believe you actually drew us a picture of your eyes. You take the devotion to blogging to a whole new level.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Do you think Stretch will think that you don't like it since you can't make Saturday?

    ReplyDelete
  14. Alice,

    I am blind and having a hard time reading your blog.

    ReplyDelete
  15. that's ICE out there?! I thought it was snowing!

    ACH!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Those eyes are so realistic looking! Come to Alice's blog for the dating stories, stay for the special effects. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  17. So what we're saying is that if they dilate your pupils just right your vision will be perfect? Can you get some of those drops and experiment?

    ReplyDelete
  18. Woah, that sounds really freaky. How long did it last?

    ReplyDelete
  19. Some of my worst eye-related moments involve having my eyes dilated (but really - how many eye-related moments does a person HAVE? - so that's not really saying much). ANYWAY - hate that test. I also hate the "puff of air" test because I always freaking BLINK even though I try not to. And then they have to do it again. And again. And again.

    Also: I'm surprised they didn't offer you those ROCKING huge plastic shades that actually fit OVER your glasses. Those are awesome. And I've worn them a number of times after the eye dilation business.

    ReplyDelete
  20. they say that if your eyes dialate fast, so will your thing when giving birth. You will be glad for that!! LOL

    ReplyDelete