February 12, 2008

more fodder for my sitcom pilot

i keep thinking i won't spew my whining about The Parents here any more? except then they do something that i can't deal with until i write it down and have a ton of people sympathize with me. hi! blogging is cheaper than therapy!

so tonight i scrounged up a box from the grocery store on my way home, excited to pack up a box of kitchen stuff, just for the symbolism. plus, it's not like i can use my kitchen any more, since The Parents have taken it over. like, thrown away everything in the fridge they no longer want there; they rearranged cabinets; they decided beer doesn't go in the fridge any more. and they're in there putzing for all three meals of the day. so i figured, hey! i don't use that stuff any more, let me pack it up and feel happy.

so The Parents walk in while i've got a box on the floor and some dishes piled up around me. the mom squeals - i kid you not, SQUEALS, IN GLEE - and says "oooooh! you're packing! so this means you're leaving??"

after a blank stare, i said that yes, i was. i'd be out by the end of the month. the dad chimes in at this point saying "oh nice, that's even better than the end of march! that's when we thought you were leaving. this is great."

more blank stares from me.

the dad: "we're planning to move all our furniture back in, and we didn't know what we were going to do about your drum set. but now you'll just be taking it with you, so we don't have to deal with it."

hi. remember that time i lived here? and PAID YOU to KEEP MY THINGS IN YOUR HOUSE? i guess not.

*deep breaths*

two more weeks. i can make it two more weeks.


i exercised my democratic rights today and voted in the chesapeake primary. i know it makes me sort of a nerd, but i find voting exciting. it's even cooler when my vote actually MATTERS, though. as a democrat living in a solid red state, voting can end up being sort of.. um.. symbolic. like a way to make sure the democratic candidate comes out with 11% of the vote instead of 8%. woo. but today's ballot had actual meaning! my vote can actually make a difference in who gets the democratic nomination. that's AWESOME. it's been a while since i was even vaguely excited about politics, since i find the current political scene fairly depressing and appalling. if by "fairly" you mean "vastly, utterly, and completely." which i do. but now! excitement! a heated (and CLEAN, so far) race! change: we're ready for you. open arms and all that.


off i go to figure out something for dinner. my friend (eg daughter of The Parents) is here with her fiance tonight, and invited me to eat with them, but... no. i will not be caught dead sitting at a table with The Parents, unfortunately. think it will be awkward if i run out for, like, mac & cheese and a bottle of wine instead of eating with them?


  1. Your state is not THAT red. Your area of the state totally put Webb into the Senate. Go you guys!

    Also, the parents? Evil evil BAD. So glad you're moving.

  2. It suddenly occurs to me to wonder if they DO know you're paying rent. Because the way they talk to you, it's exactly as if they think you're "crashing" there. I would be seriously tempted to say something mild about how I DO pay money to live there.

    Also: I hate them.

  3. Those parents are CA-RAZ-AY! SERIOUSLY. And I second Swistle's comment - are they so dumb that they don't even know you're actually paying rent?

  4. Wow! They really want you out of the place.

  5. I like how you guys got rid of George Allen. He would have been a terrible president.

  6. I think you should leave the parents a going away gift ... like the next couple weeks worth of litter box mess spewed around the house.

  7. I don't know how you keep your cool. I'd lose my shit.

    Squealing? What a terrible, terrible person. Really.

    I say avoid them with mac and cheese and wine as often as your little heart desires!

  8. They are, as my friend says "batshit insane cuckoo pants". I'm so glad you're out of there. Psychos.

  9. I'm with Swistle - they either don't know you're paying rent or don't know how the renter/ landlord arrangement works. But they sound super rude either way.

  10. At this point, why give a damn if anything's awkward if it'll minimize the time you have left there! I would be running away from them all the time!

    So glad you found a new place!!!