June 30, 2009

what i'll do for cheese.

last night, i found myself in an interesting situation. i had just been to a pretty intense class at the gym, and whenever i work out that hard i tend to crave very specific things for dinner. last night it was cheese. (there's this new-to-me cheese at whole foods called humboldt fog, which is this delicious goat cheese that's crumbly in the middle and gooey on the outside and... uggglllrrbbll *drool*.) i had some leftover swiss chard at home, already cooked, and with the cheese? and some french bread? and my favorite cheap white wine - also located at whole foods - well. i NEEDED IT.

the only problem was my... um... attire. i was wearing bike shorts - as in, skin tight, short, black, and shiny - and a pretty form-fitting tank top over my sports bra. and because the gym class is dance-ish, i hadn't brought sneakers in my gym bag. usually i have a pair of flip flops living in there, but i guess they hadn't made it back in during the last repack. which meant that all i had to wear were the shoes i'd been wearing at work earlier that day. which were 3" black heels.

so to recap, i was wearing booty shorts and 3" heels. as i wailed to gertrude over the phone, "i can't go into whole foods looking like a hooker! a SWEATY hooker!"

it was an internal battle of epic proportions, i'll tell you what. because the more i thought about my delicious cheese / wine, the crueler it seemed not to be able to have it. but... whole foods. DRESSED LIKE A HOOKER. it's not like running into a 7-11, where it's a small space and i could scoot in and out; it's a large store full of well dressed people. and the cheese counter is alllll the way in the back corner.

ultimately, i pulled into the whole foods parking lot and rummaged through my trunk until i - thankfully - found a pair of old ratty sneakers, and was able to replace the heels. cheese and wine FTW.


after months of meaning to any never getting around to it, i joined bookmooch.com yesterday. i'm sending out my first 5 books this afternoon! so now i have all these points that i can use to get books sent to me... and... um. well. i was so excited to have any! book! i wanted! sent to me, but now i'm completely paralyzed on what books i want. i've gone though a ton of your (excellent!) suggestions from last year, so now i need your help again: what are some good books you've read recently? or old-time favorites?


  1. I read The Other Boleyn Girl (having not seen the movie) and while the writing sometimes reminded me of the awkward old-timey stories I used to write when I was ten, the story was excellent and it was a fun read.

    I am also about to start reading The Angel's Game by Carlos Ruiz Zafon, because I loved his last book (The Shadow of the Wind).

    Also, if you hadn't found those sneakers, I seriously hope that you would have gone in anyway. Who cares? We're talking about WINE AND CHEESE. And there are all sorts of weirdos in Whole Foods anyway.

  2. I was hungry last night when I finally got home, and I thought about making some chili, but I didn't have any cheese to sprinkle over it so I went to bed hungry instead.

    What do you like to read? Do you have any genre boundaries you won't cross?

    Catch 22 - Heller. All time favorite.

    Empire of the Sun - JG Ballard. The memoir the movie was based on (both movie & book = excellent).

    Exorcist - William Blatty. SCARY. But DC appropriate.

    Water for Elephants - Sara Gruen. Circus. Elephant. Great Depression. Entertaining enough.

    Chris Buckley's stuff. Usually pretty good -- I particularly enjoyed Little Green Men.

    Terror - Dan Simmons. Historical horror, very good, not especially scary.

    The Company - Robert Littell. It's about the CIA.

  3. I would walk in barefoot to get some wine and cheese. Especially cheese. *am drooling right now*

    Books: Three Cups of Tea, Journey to the Center of the Earth, and Confessions of a Shopaholic.

    What? It was a fun read.

  4. I have so been in this place. I think it would be worse to be a SWEATY hooker. Like you just finished up.

    I don't know what sort of books you like to read, but I read all of Jen Lancaster's memoirs and they are hilarious. I'm getting ready to start Water for Elephants and My Sister's Keeper is on my list.

  5. I would've worn the heels to get cheese. Most definitely!

    I'm reading the Dexter books now by Jeff Lindsay. Excellent stuff.

    Um...I've read a ton of books lately, but yet I cannot remember anything. I'll be back.

  6. Books: The Host, Crime and Punishment, Jane Eyre, the Something Borrowed/Something Blue series, Prep

    I see some wacky people in the Whole Foods I go to so honestly, I might not have thought much of it but I understand the concern. I would have felt the same way.

  7. i want pics of the outfit, damnit.

  8. What Ken said. Also last night I had a lot of food to eat. So now I feel fat, at least somebody is dancing their ass off besides the people on Oxygen.

  9. Mmmmmm, sweaty hooker.

    Er, I mean mmmmmmm, goat cheese.

  10. Hoo,boy. The image of you in 3" black heels and workout gear MADE MY MORNING. Too bad you found the sneaks. Hee!

    Also, I am impressed you wear 3" heels. I - cannot. I have skinny freakin' heels and they slide out of any sort of shoe = pumps, flats, anything. Sucks.

    I just read "Nightwalker (Dark Days Book 1)" by - er, Jocyline somebody??? It is a vampire book, and not at all Twitlight-like. It is still cheesy, but a fun read.

  11. dude, I would have gone in barefoot. it's cheese! so worth the foot herpes.

    my book suggestions are:

    Shantaram by Gregory David Roberts
    and Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett

  12. sadness, no sappy love romance bullshit?!?!?!

    *slinks off into a corner crying over my romance novel*

    seriously though? what kind of books DO you like?

    historical? I'd rec Count of Monte Cristo, The Other Boleyn Girl, Emma, Pillars of the Earth, or The Mists of Avalon

    lit fic? Secret Life of Bees, Snow Falling on Cedars, The 13th Tale, or The Joy Luck Club

    non fic? anything by Bill Bryson or James Herriot

    chick lit/ dick lit: Savannah Blues, The Painted House, Bourne Identiy, Can You Keep a Secret?

  13. YOU are hilarious! Seriously. Pull that shit when you come to Chicago next month and not only will you look like a hooker in Whole Foods, but you'll have pee next to you on the street, cuz you'll make me pee in my pants from laughter.

    Reading This Is Not the Life I Ordered - blogged about it today.

  14. Humboldt Fog! I don't own 3" heels, but would put some on to get some of that cheese.

    Good books: I recently read both The Collector by John Fowles (creepy!) and White Tiger by Aravind Adiga, which has similar themes but is a lot less depressing than the equally good A Fine Balance by Rohinton Mistry. Anathem by Neal Stephenson is fun but dorky, too. The Power of One by Bryce Courtenay is one of my all-time favorites. There's also a collection of action/adventure short stories called McSweeney' Mammoth Treasure of Thrilling Tales, edited by Michael Chabon and with stuff from Neil Gaiman, Michael Crichton, David Eggers, Stephen King. Some of the stories are great, others are meh, but overall it was good light reading.

  15. One of my favorite books is "Good Omens" by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. It's a quick read and it's ridiculously entertaining and funny.

    I love humboldt fog. It's amaaazing.

  16. I am such a hick, gooey/crumbly cheese does not sound like it is worth hooker shopping, and what is swiss chard????? damn.

    I am reading the book by the lady who is Stabler's wife on SVU and her husband dumped her. Isabelle something. I am quite the help.

  17. Wildwood Dancing by Juliet Marillier
    Katherine by Anya Seton
    Hattie Big Sky by Kirby Larson
    My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Piccoult
    The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold
    The Almost Moon by Alice Sebold
    Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert
    Any book you can find by Philippa Gregory

    There are a plethora of books I could recommend. I'm such a big reader.

  18. Unaccostumed Earth by Jhumpa Lahiri. Love her.

    I want to try this cheese, but Whole Foods and my bank account do not get along. Sigh.

  19. I would have paid good money to see you in the faux hooker get up!

    Love Walked In by Marisa de los Santos and its follow up, Belong To Me.

  20. ooohh tough call that one. Glad it worked out. I think I'd have skipped the cheese.

  21. Glad it worked out without compromising your dignity.

    -"The Glass Castle (Jeanette Walls)
    -"Glamorama" (Bret Easton Ellis)
    -"Less Than Zero" (Bret Easton Ellis
    -"Shopgirl" (Steve Martin)

  22. Be proud of that sweat! :) Show it off! ;) Okay, without hooker heels ;)

  23. Bright Shiny Morning by James Frey (yes, THAT James Frey). Amazing book, dude may be a liar, but he can write.

  24. Wow.... cheese comment from our earlier g-chat makes so much more sense now... I'm a little behind.

    Recently read "Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell" by Susanna Clarke - it's Harry Potter meets Pride and Prejudice. Story of 2 magicians in 19th century England. I think you'll love it, but its thick!

    As far as other books people recommended... The Other Boelyn Girl was pretty good, and I really liked The Thirteenth Tale (Setterfield).

  25. Are you going to dress like a sweaty hooker when I meet you? lol

    I just finished reading "Any Bitter Thing" by Monica Wood. It was such a great read that I swallowed it in 2 huge bites. (Now my in-laws are here and my house is a mess, but I'm glad I finished my book!)

  26. you just made my wednesday morning!! sweaty hooker by alice - i think that should be your clothing line...maybe have some gals from the hills model for it :)
    books - i bought unaccustomed earth by jhumpa lahiri, american wife by curtis s.(the writer of prep), and one fifth ave. by candace bushnell..i think they will be good, but i haven't started on them! twilight books come highly recommended by yosh!

  27. You do what you gotta do for wine and cheese... even if one small misunderstanding about what you're wearing to get them could get you arrested.

  28. I will have plenty of cheese and wine for you on Saturday... promise. You've earned it.

  29. Try The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows.

    Weird title but a wonderful book.

  30. Awww, I was totally expecting a hilariously embarassing story here - boo -urns! Shoulda gone in in your heels!

    I've got so many books: Time Travelers Wife was good, about to read Ines of my Soul. The Dark Tower series by Stephen King is great and will take up your whole years. As someone else mentioned, Shadow of teh Wind is an awesome book.

    Also, Never Let Me GO...that book will change your view on life. I was like shaken for days after reading it!

  31. Also, Jane Eyre...I'm reading it on my iTouch (how 2019 am I?) for the millionth time!

  32. How is it that I have just discovered you? I feel a little bit like we might be the same person. Goat cheese? YES. Sweaty workout clothes? DEFINITELY. White wine? OH HELL YES. Hello friend.

    Also, I don't think I could begin to recommend books, because I have so many great ones. You should meander to my blog and check out my shelves on the Good Reads link there.

  33. I love how you just glossed over the nature of that class with "dance-ish" and the mention that you had no workout shoes--only three-inch heels. Hmmmm... ;-)

  34. That's funny, I wish you had a picture of that!!

  35. LMAO - In my opinion, cheese and wine are worth dressing like a hooker for.