March 27, 2006

just how pasty white am i? scroll down to find out!

have i mentioned that i'm down to one crutch now? i can't remember if i shared that piece of info yet, but if not: guess what guys? i'm down to one crutch now!! this is EXCELLENT NEWS, trust me. it's mainly excellent because it means i've been granted the use of my right hand again. yes! i can once again carry actual objects, in my hand, from one room to another, or from my car to the office, or from a store to my house. most importantly, obviously, i can carry FOOD in my hand, which means i can (and do) eat, like, all the time now. i missed that while on 2 crutches. but now! i can carry almost ANYTHING! with my HAND! which is now free again! huzzah!

the downside to this is that while walking with crutches is pretty sad and all, walking with ONE crutch is, if possible, even sadder. i walk like a decrepit old man now, all hunched and lurchy with my one crutch. but i'm way more mobile, because although tiring, one-crutching is not NEARLY as tiring as two-crutching, which essentially amounts to propelling my body via push up, and my upper body strength is reeeeally not at the level one might desire for push-up-powered traveling.

so anyway. i hobbled back to my desk at work the other day, and noticed off-handedly that my one good leg, the one i walk on (and frequently hop on... it's kind of annoying to get all crutched out just to move a short distance, so i'll often get where i need and back by hopping on one foot, if it seems easier in the long run) was sore. i sat at my computer and reached down to kinda rub my calf while reading my emails, but i was startled by how.... large... my calf felt. and... solid. very large and solid.

i felt my other calf, the gimpy one, to see if maybe i just forgot what calves feel like, and they're normally large and rock-like. uh, no. gimp calf was feeling mushy and wee, in comparison. i hiked up my pants legs and took a gander at my legs... and holy crap if i didn't have one puny leg and one popeye-on-spinach leg. i look SILLY.

so, today i took pictures for you :-) please excuse the blindingly pale skin. it's winter, ok?? and i'm crippled! i can't be expected to fake tan when i'm crippled and it's winter!! hush! also, it's kind of hard to tell just how different my legs look in these pictures for some reason. i added helpful measurements in that last one (which were scientifically derived by using the "ruler" at the top of Micrsoft Word and pasting the pictures of my legs into Word and, uh, estimating how many inches wide the.. erm.. picture was at each point. i'm a french major, ok? not a scientist!)

this is the.. uh.. alice-eye-view. but it's kinda hard to make out, so i took this one:

and let me tell you, it's hard to figure out how to take a picture of the backs of your own legs at work. but i did! i'm so resourceful.

and here we have the "darn it, i swear that leg on the right is bigger!" one, complete with utterly meaningless measurements. i work very hard all day. honest.


  1. *L*L*L* two weeks after you toss the last crutch you will not notice the differnce!

    and yup, those are some seriously pasty white limbs....are you sure you do not live in Minnesota?

  2. Interesting (and inventive) way to measure your legs, but should you have used a light meter instead?! LOL! ~ jb///

  3. nice stems, Alice!!! you might want to rub that chalk off though..


  4. I'm blind! I'm blind!

  5. AHHHHHH....MY EYES!!!!

    Erm...sorry. Lovely calves regardless. Once you're completely healed, all you need to is hop everywhere on the other leg and you'll be fine. Be sure to post pictures of that.

  6. Hahahaha. I can see a bit of a difference, I guess. You have a lot of courage posting pics of your bare legs. I'll give you credit for that, I wouldn't dare.

  7. Of COURSE you work hard all day.

    And I love the ultra-fashionable black shoe. HOT.

  8. I sympathize on the pale-ness. You can practically see through me!

    Horray for one crutch! Next up: zero!

  9. Oh my gosh, I loved your measurements.

    That's awesome.

  10. Yes that qualifies as pasty...I have seen british people more tan than that... and that's saying a lot.

    But I am one to stay out of the sun... so I can't speak...from my own pastyness.


  11. nah, you not that white.

    Now my that's white....during parish Pic-Nics....everyone has to put on sunglasses just to look in his direction!

  12. HAHAHA. I love it.

    Are you still new? I'm new-ish and STILL don't have enough to do.

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  14. With one hand free it means you can walk and pick your nose again. Oh, I wouldn't call you pasty skinned, albino maybe, but definitely not pasty. Just kidding.

  15. There doesn't look like there is a humongous difference but one is just more muscular. Now you've just got to get the other o ne in that kind of shape.

  16. Don't know about the pasty part, but I like your calves ( calfs sp? ).


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